The sad fact is that many of the couples who finally seek marriage and couples counseling when trouble arises have done little to prepare themselves for the challenges and ins-and-outs of marriage or a committed relationship. And this is probably true for couples who never go into counseling as well.
Why do most couples put more time, energy and attention into their wedding day than into acquiring the tools and information needed to protect the future of their union?
The Magic of Fresh Love Blinds Us to Certain Realities
When couples fall in love, they often get swept away in a whirlwind of intense feelings, deep connection and unbridled passion. Our experience of falling in love feels so unique and special (and different from every other couple on the face of the earth) that we place ourselves above the painful realities that befall other mere mortals. I’ve even heard some newlyweds arrogantly dismiss divorced couples as “never really being in love in the first place.”
But the truth is that most divorced couples probably at one point felt that their relationship was extraordinary and immune to the relationship toxins that obliterate so many other relationships.
So maybe we’re all vulnerable to marital and relationship problems and should take the additional steps (preferably early on in the marriage/relationship) to build a solid relationship foundation (a foundation not only built on intense feelings).
So what can you do?
Research has demonstrated that premarital counseling increases the likelihood of marital success (in other words, a little preventive medicine goes a long way when it comes to your relationship).
So if you’re planning to marry, recently married or starting a committed relationship, I highly recommend the Premarital Counseling Workbook for Couples, by Lisa Brookes Kift, MFT.
This comprehensive premarital resource covers such vital issues as:
- Developing effective communication skills
- How to deepen emotional safety (essential for intimacy)
- Acquiring relationship balance
- Overcoming problematic family-of-origin issues
- How to assess your marriage/relationship expectations
- Creating a personal and marriage vision
The Premarital Counseling Workbook for Couples gives you the structure and clarity to explore these vital relationship issues with your partner. And the best part is, you can do this from the comfort and privacy of your own home and at your own pace.
Doesn’t your relationship deserve it?
To find out more, Visit Lisa’s website for more information
Until next time,
Dr. Rich Nicastro